Have Conversations
This week as we break down what it looks like for people like you and I to be culture shapers instead of allowing the culture to shape us, we are chatting about the importance of conversation.
The thing with this 12 week Culture Change series that we are doing is these tips really don’t sound very big, hard, or life changing. However, at Stories Foundation we talk a lot about how the small things become big things, and when we all begin to shift how we interact in the spaces we already are, then we will see a culture that has allowed for human trafficking exploitation to breed, begin to shine a light in the places it has been growing with the purpose of seeing it decrease in our communities.
It is a myth that trafficking is something that doesn’t affect each and everyone of us. Because of an over sexualized culture that feeds sexual addictions, starting with pornography, partnered with an individualized culture and a lack of responsibility with our purchasing power, each and every person can change something in their own lives to combat human exploitation and slavery in 2021.
Last week we shared that we can start small and that starting with one thing, one small step, can start us on a journey of having a life defined by justice (having a genuine concern for people) .
This week I want us to consider the conversations we have, or don’t have, and the power of our influence through what we talk about in the places of community we inhabit. There are three conversations I want to challenge us to begin to have in relationship to fighting to change a culture that allows for human trafficking and exploitation. Conversations that draw out stories, conversations about sex and relationships, conversations about our power as consumers.
Conversations that Draw Out Story.
Every person has a story, and every story has value. Along with that, every story is full of nuance and layers. A character in a novel would be boring if the author didn’t let us in to the details of a person’s life, past experiences play into who they are, how they act, and how they got to where they are. The same is true in life. You might look at someone and think you know their story, but in reality you might not have any idea about where they have been or what they have experienced. We allow for our own experiences and pre-conceived ideas to make up stories for other people instead of taking the time to listen and know where a person is coming from and how they go to where they are.
To fight against trafficking by covering vulnerabilities and understanding the inequities that allow for exploitation and trafficking to flourish we have to put aside the stories we write for others based on looks and first impressions and truly listen to understand where the person is coming from and what he/she experienced. When we do this we will begin to see that exploitation, abuse and trafficking truly does happen all around us. Our vision will begin to change and so will how we engage in our communities. We must choose to have conversations that draw out a person’s story. Ask questions. Start with compassion and curiosity. We can’t shut people down in judgement and assuming we already know where they have come from because more likely than not, we don’t.
Healthy Conversations about Sex and Relationships.
It seems to me the majority of conversations that take place around sex and relationships are short and abrupt at best and unhealthy at worst. There is either an “everything is out in the open” approach or an “everything is private” approach to conversations about sex and relationships with the result being a pendulum swing of unhealthy assumptions, many things left unsaid while other things are given too much emphasis all while hiding the real issues. We need to start talking about what a healthy relationship looks like, stop talking about sex in a shame-based way while also combatting the belief that sex is a basic need akin to food, shelter and water. We also need to acknowledge and have conversations around how the media has commandeered sex to sell everything and the relationship with that messaging to not seeing human beings as people but instead seeing them as objects to satisfy desires.
Conversations about sex and relationships can feel overwhelming, embarrassing, awkward and even like an overstep in our individualized, “it’s none of my business” culture. The reality is, because we aren’t talking about sex in a productive, truth-filled way, false and harmful information about sex and relationships are being perpetuated by the media and perpetrators. If you have been give the gift of healthy relationships, don’t assume others have as well. Talk about it, and watch how being a safe person for real conversations changes the culture you live in.
Have Conversations about the Power of Purchasing.
When manufacturing moved from being primarily in the United States to overseas factories people in North America lost their connection to the people behind the products they purchased. Add that to a materialistic culture that went from 4 seasons in the fashion industry to a new “season” every two weeks resulting in a culture of consumption, fast fashion, cheap products which drives the labor trafficking industry overseas. The days are over where we can ignore the power we have as consumers, it is our responsibility as human beings to research the companies we purchase from and hold them accountable to a higher standard on a global stage. And, there is also a place for grace in this topic. People have budgets we are used to spending less on items than what they cost to make and we don’t understand the global economy or the exploitation of workers in countries whose infrastructure is different than our own.
Because of all of this, if you have become educated about ethical fashion, purposeful purchase, fair trade etc. a conversation you can choose to begin having in your spheres of influence is one around sustainable practices when it comes to labor, ethical companies, B Corp businesses, giveback orgs and the list goes on. There are fun ways to have these conversations, like partnering with a fair trade, ethical company to introduce new products, and new labor ideas, to a consumer driven marketplace.
Conversations Matter.
As you can see, conversations matter. Your voice is valuable and how you use it in the spaces you have influence in your community can have a big impact, even it you start in a small way. Consistency of value and being willing to speak up in a compassionate way when it comes to hard topics will make a lasting difference on those around you. How you interact with those who you see every day, if you stop and take the time to listen to their stories, will change the way you see and interact with people you encounter who are strangers as well as acquaintances and friends.
Choose to have conversations today, start with your family or those you are close to, then wait for an opportunity at work, or think of a fun way to engage in something like ethical shopping together virtually. Our voices hold so much power, don’t be afraid to tap into it.
